A Perspective from a MomWarrior


A warrior is a person who possesses strength, wisdom, and grit. I founded MomWarrior with the idea that we—all of us—have a warrior within us. Even if we don’t feel like we are warriors every day, we are every day warriors. As a woman, you don’t need a shield or the Wonder Woman emblem to be one. You are enough. This isn’t about brute, physical power; this is about the strength that comes from within and the wisdom we impart to the people around us. 

I’d like to introduce you to a MomWarrior I met recently. Her name is Lou Fancher, a writer and journalist, among other professional positions. Here is her MomWarrior perspective, which she says is fluid and on this wave, had her thoughts and mine co-mingling.

Enjoy reading!

Sincerely, Tet


I am a woman and full of wonder, but I am not Wonder Woman.

Fear: Is that why I’ve stalled? I have yet to see female superhero actor Gal Gadot do her Amazon warrior thing under the direction of Patty Jenkins in Warner Bros. PIctures’ $100 million feature film, Wonder Woman.

Will seeing it break the glossy yahoo the film has generated on social media? If I see the movie and fail to see the empowerment women I overhear talking about it see; if I think it’s exploitative and not liberating, does that mean I don’t fit in with women? What if it makes me question smart articles written about the film by writers I admire? Like this one:  http://time.com/4606107/wonder-woman-breaks-through/

I ask Tet if she’s seen the movie. I mean, we’re both busy—me with an 18-year-old, high-maintenance kid (read special needs) miraculously headed to college, and Tet, with four girls under age 12, launching startups (bentogirl and MomWarrior), working to get past grief over the death of her mother earlier this year and more.

“Yes, I have seen it,” Tet says, proving she is more warrior than I. “A little cheesy, but I liked how Diana was not sexualized. And it was amazing how they used real life “momwarriors” on Paradise Island. Being a strong woman doesn’t necessarily mean physical strength. They were strong, yes. But these were women of character, great wisdom, and resiliency.”

I bet Bozoma Saint John, Chief Brand Officer at Uber, has seen Wonder Woman. In fact, she is a real life wonderment. Brilliant, skilled, statuesque, soldiering through momhood, surviving loss of spouse, slaying sexual harassment in the workplace by entering the lion’s den to kick out the beasts. If we had more Saint Johns, Tet Salvas and Gal Gadots in the world…wow, I wonder.

Tet goes on to say that the movie for her dispelled the notions of “run like a girl,” “throw like a girl,” “act emotional like a girl.” She says it was cool to see females kick butt and to know that Gadot was actually pregnant during a portion of the filming.

Dad’s on the set pushed babies in strollers while their actor wives performed jaw-dropping, muscular stunts. The scenes described in articles about the making of the film add to it’s feminist momism.

And there you have it: feminist momism. Are the words antagonistic, cult, trope trendy or best buddies? If you consider pop singer Adele a feminist mom, you might say “best buddies.” Her massive hit, “Hello,” entered the 2015 top five Billboard Hot 100 list with a HitPredictor rating of 105—easily topping hit singles by Drake, Shawn Mendes, Justin Bieber and The Weeknd all rated in the 70s. There’s power in a body capable of birthing and belting out beloved tunes. There’s power in a woman who does not need men to define her worth but at the same time knows how to love a man, a boy, a girl, herself—that’s for sure.

Again, I wonder. If we’re honest, we can’t all slay cinematic or corporate dragons, sling films or songs with box office and record returns that guarantee sequels, or stake claim in a startup that changes the lives of girls and women. Are we wonder women?

I’m not sure that I have an answer yet, but I know one thing. If I’m going to find out where I stand, if I’m going to look at fear and move past it, women will be my first go-to.

Tet tells me when I ask her about the movie and the upcoming MomWarrior LA conference that her brain is tired from not sleeping well. She isn’t wonder woman after all, she seems say. But I know better, because MomWarriors and wonder women stand where they are and reach out to other moms for ballast. I tell Tet it’s ok to feel fried and encourage her to get rest and rise refreshed. Lean on me, call me, I say. And wonder of wonders, I’m a wonder woman, a momwarrior, Amazonian. Supporting another woman has made me strong and swept away my fear.